Plus, even survivors of the happiest of marriages aren't immune to the head-rush of new love; our humanity trumps all.Embracing that might sweeten your disposition toward cake-bearing Kathies.Dear Carolyn: Four months ago, my mother died unexpectedly and suddenly at 53.
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I haven't said anything negative, though I do try to change the subject after I say something like, "Well that sounds fun." Is this something I need to come to terms with on my own, or is there a non-hurtful way to ask him to stop mentioning any women unless it gets serious? Your dad is dating "too much, too quickly" -- and that makes it something you can't ask your father to fix, no matter how understandable your discomfort is.
I don't want to cut myself off emotionally, but his talking about "Kathy" baking him cake is surprisingly upsetting. You're both still grieving and you're both doing so in your own ways, which is fine. You don't say whether you've gotten any grief counseling yourself, but if you haven't, then please do.
The concept of my mom dating or another man being around never ... Question from a Reader: My dad died 11 months ago at the age of 55. When one parent dies and the remaining parent begins dating someone else ...
for the adult child to accept, no matter how soon after the death it occurs. well, he started 'seeing' someone about 2 months after my mom passed.
But I can't help but feel perturbed by this; it feels like too much too quickly.
Additionally, he has completely eschewed any grief counseling (I haven't pushed it -- he complains that his doctors keep bringing it up).
A support group is ideal for talking about your discomfort openly, and might remove the pressure you feel to say something to your dad.
As you'll probably hear from others at such a session (readers mention it just about every time this subject comes up), widow(er)s who jump into dating often are the ones who most enjoyed their marriages; they're motivated to find that kind of happiness again.
No one can replace what your father shared with your mother, of course, but I suspect most aren't in it for that.